Happy blur of religious holidays

New York Times columnist Judith Warner (whose columns often address the trials and rewards of parenting) wrote a sweetly understated piece about religious traditions, as she prepares for Passover with her mother but also Easter, somewhat ironically entitled "This I believe." Nobody in her family is particularly religious, but some things - the words to the Passover seder, the hymns she had to sing going to an Episcopal girls school - have become almost "instinctual," a comfort, and their own kind of legacy... How to pass this on to children is her question to us. The essay ends:

“I think that enough harm has been done in the name of religion,” said Julia [her daughter], who had not long before studied the conquest of the Incas and had moved on to the colonization of Africa. “I don’t want to be a part of it.”

I don’t care what they say.

Writing this – while my mother shops and cooks, polishes silver, sets the table, decants the wine – I am thrilled at the prospect of later celebrating Passover with our motley Jewish-Catholic-Episcopalian crew, commemorating events we don’t believe in, confirming an identity that doesn’t quite fit, united in the love of one another.

And on Sunday, I am going to Easter services, in a church [Unitarian] where people define rebirth and renewal in all sorts of personal ways. My mom, I know, will be happy to come with me.

The column's worth reading, and so are the responses, some of which are predictable but most of which are thoughtful; some are downright surprising, like this one from an Alecia Stevens :

Thanks for this. I was raised as a Christian and the way I look at it, it is my “karma” to be that. It is as good as any other religion; no better, no worse. It’s just the one I got. And my job, as a mom, is to MODEL a spiritual practice for my children, so that they may know what that feels and looks like. When they are adults, they can choose to practice or not. They can choose to be Buddhist (as is my step-son) or a Hindu or Jewish or a Christian or whatever else they like. Or nothing at all, but I doubt that will happen. I do believe that our being born into a faith is no small matter. Even the Dalai Lama suggests you think carefully about changing your faith.

I am so grateful for the ritual of my Episcopal service. It transports me to a world between Heaven and Earth (I use Heaven metaphorically.) Life is so very hard and so very beautiful at the same time; I do not know where that is more perfectly expressed than at my church service where beauty, death, forgiveness and rebirth are celebrated weekly.

And this one from a Danielle Saunders:

A primary reason I have decided to raise my daughter in the mainstream Roman Catholic faith that my husband and I were brought up with–even though neither of us is very religious–is so that she will be less inclined when she’s older to adopt a more “radical” faith. I’ve known too many people who were raised by resolutely secular, even atheist, parents yet later became Mormons, fundamentalist Christians, and, in one case, a Muslim (though she did later leave Islam). Others joined non-religious but cult-like groups like SAGE, EST, etc. I firmly believe that many people who are raised with no spiritual traditions or beliefs will eventually seek one and, unfortunately, may fall victim (as I see it) to unhealthy or extreme religions.